VOL 175,000 Issue 1
Even though Dr. Adam Axdropp earns an obnoxious salary untethered to the compensation of rank-and-file school district teachers and employees, it should be noted that he carefully listens to his grandchildren’s daily narratives and does a great Sean Connery impression. While it is true that Dr. Axdropp (who cuts an outdated, tightly wound, privileged, patrician figure in his suburban banker’s suit and tie at each school board meeting) imported several incompetent rubber-stampers from his previous school district rather than retain qualified, homegrown administrators, it is also true that he dotes on his wife of 42 years, Penny, and regularly cooks lasagna for a local food pantry. Although Dr. Axdropp much prefers to talk about arming several new school resource officers rather than hiring one additional special education teacher, it should not be overlooked that he recently donated a kayak and canoe to a boating club, where he gives free lessons. And yes, Dr. Axdropp thinks that closing elementary schools to consolidate and build one sterile institution way out in the hinterlands, with no regard for educational values or community impact, is something to proudly champion so long as you merely pay lip service to Efficiency, but he also juggles and rides a unicycle, plays trombone in a brass band that performs at senior citizen facilities, and laughs heartily with you, not at you.