Movies and Marketing
VOL 20 Issue 20
In a testament to human ingenuity and superiority over Artificial Intelligence software, Randy Schnickens won the inaugural Man vs. Machine challenge, which entailed naming future movie sequels. Selected at random was the popular Die Hard franchise which, as all of us know, featured the sensible titles, “A Good Day to Die Hard,” “Live Free or Die Hard” and “Die Hard With a Vengeance.” For the contest, the mixed team of human and robot judges scored the names according to how brand-enhancing, clever, formulaic and likely they were. Schnickens’ top-scoring titles were:
- Die Hard: The Hardening
- Die Hard: The Bigger They Come, the Harder They Die
- The Die Hard Die-aries
- Die Hard: The Hard Army
- Die Hard: Port of Death: Hardtown
- Ixnay on the Eye Day Ard Hay
- DH XX LMFAO
- Die Hard: Infinity of Dead Hardness
- Lil’ Die Hards
- Die Hard Presents: McClane Unchained
- Why Did the Chicken Die Hard?
- Die Hard Craps: Hardways and a Yo
- How to Train Your Die Hard
- Quaternary Die Hard: Maniac Masseur vs Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom
- Die Hard: Bad Guys Have Accents
- Die Hard Say Wha’choo Talkin’ ‘Bout, Bruce Willis?
- Regarding Die Hard
- Die Hard: After the Colon
- Diamonds Die the Hardest, Talc Dies the Softest
- Yippee Ki-Yay, Mother Teresa
The Schnickens victory comes as software systems have recently defeated mankind at chess, Go and Dota 2 in preparation for world dominance. At press time, there are reports of spontaneous celebrations of interesting, creative people who are pursuing worthwhile endeavors, are concerned about the Tech Singularity, and enjoy their cinema mindlessly serialized and named by humans.